May 25, 2013 (I wrote this post last night in my journal)
What’s the point of all of this? That’s my mom’s voice.
You can get rid of your stuff when you move.
Why are you doing this now?
Your apartment is a mess now.
You have no where to put your stuff.
Your apartment looked cute – it wasn’t cluttered – so why are you bothering doing this now?
Interesting who’s voices have come to visit me tonight.
I’m doing it cause I feel guided to.
I’m doing it cause I want to.
I WANT TO.
Sure there’s concern of having nothing left. No furniture. No place to store my stuff. But the greater feeling is to purge. YES. Some of it has imprints of my ex – my time with him. Other of it just feels like it’s time to go. Old. It’s ready to leave. I’m ready – happy – joyous – to release it.
Let it be with its new owner.
A place it’s happy to be in.
I’m putting my ex’s wood chest for sale tomorrow. It’s something he made. It’s well made, cheery, colorful. But it’s time has come to leave.
Keep things rolling.
We’ll see what comes to fill the void.
Yea, maybe that’ll feel weird, being in an “empty” apartment but it’s not empty. There’s plenty of stuff here. Things I truly need and like to be around.
I’m going to release my nightstand too. Not sure what to put my journal and crystals on besides my bed. The floor may be okay. It may have to be that.
The nightstand was made by my ex as well.
I don’t need it anymore.
Releasing it all.
Opening the space for things to move forward.
I see how this stuff has been helping keep me grounded here – but now it’s my time to fly.
Yes, yes, yes!