March 7, 2013

So as I shared with you, I’ve been watching a lot of these videos of writers, directors, producers — and Terry Perry, wow.

He inspires me.

This is a guy I never really paid much attention to.  I’ve seen a few of his movies and heard about him here and there.  That was it.

Last night, in talking to this woman I met who’s connected in a way to the film industry, made me start talking about Tyler Perry.  He’s a mogul.

I was passionately going off on how he amazes me.  He’s a writer, a producer, a director, plus acts in his films.

This is what I’ve been thinking about lately.  Writing my own stuff, producing it, AND being in it.

So I made a note last night to watch some of his videos and interviews today and WOW.

I had no idea he was so abused when he was a child.

And his videos of inspiration he makes now – again, WOW.

He really speaks to me.

In one of his videos he was talking about how G-d sometimes hides you.  He was talking about how for years G-d hide him.  He wasn’t making hollywood deals and wasn’t able to make connections.  He said that sometimes G-d hides you for a reason.  Yes, this is true.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately and it’s been in my mind from time to time over the years.  G-d was hiding me all these years so I could heal and so I could find out what my own gifts were.  So I could develop myself and I think also to stay pure, meaning to only be in connection with G-d.

Which leads me to another one of his videos that really spoke to me — and that was how G-d makes things happen.  He was talking about putting away your business cards and stop doing all the hustling that you’ve been doing… and just focus on your craft and G-d.  He was talking about how he kept being turned down by people who could make his play happen and he was getting really angry.  He said that G-d wanted him to be in tight connection with him — so that no one else could make him, but G-d… and so he’d turn to him for all the answers.  No one else.

And this is my path as well.

I may be blending the two videos, but that’s what I got from them.  He really spoke to my soul and moved me.  Ohh, he was also saying in those videos that because he wasn’t in the field, since all these doors kept closing on him, that he was kept pure — not doing movies the way everyone else did them, but to create his own product, to OWN it, and do things his way — since he didn’t know any other way.

Terry Perry is a mogul, he is also my hero.

Wow.  That’s all I can continue to say.  His words spoke so deeply to me.  I needed to hear them and see his video on abuse and all of that.

I feel it’s my time to come out.  I feel I am being seen now and I needed to grow my power.  I am going to be a powerful mogul like Tyler.  I have always known I was here to do something great, and I am so excited to be put in the action.

He was talking about focusing on one thing, rather than trying to do it all.  He said he knew he had to get out and make his play and he focused only on that — the rest was a gift from G-d.  Well, that’s how I feel about the book I’m writing.  Each day I focus only on that.  I need to write it and get it ready — and out there.  That’s what’s moving me from inside.

I’m also so proud of being a writer.  I feel I can do anything with my pen and paper.

Writers rule the world.  I’ve never thought that before, but now everything I see it confirms my opinion.

I can write, direct, produce, star in — and I plan to do just that.

These are my people.

Writers, directors, producers, who create their own works of art and star in them.

Yes, this is me.  This is what and who I identify with.  All these years, I couldn’t find my idols.  I had pictures of those who I looked up to, but the picture never seemed to quite fit.

But now I see them clearly.

It’s Lena Dunham – creator, writer, producer and star of her own hit HBO show, Girls

It’s Tyler Perry – creator, writer, producer, director, and star of his own movies.  An entrepreneur, owning his own 30-acre movie production studio.  WOW.  Oh wow.

It’s Rihanna – singer, songwriter, product endorser

It’s all these people and more.

People who own the world.  They have a strong vision in their heads and they go for it and make it happen.  I can do that, I can do it all — and I am ready to do just that.  I want to experience all this world has to offer.  I am so ready, I’m doing it now.

PS:  I notice I am so much more playful and joking these days.  My posts on Facebook, on my page and others have totally changed as well.