May 31, 2013

The other reason why I’m holding myself back is my ex.

Is this just an excuse or is this a legit reason?

Maybe half and half.

You see, I’m still married to him.  It’s been 1 year and a half since he’s been out of the country and us broken up — and still married.

He hasn’t been cooperative with the divorce.  He’s actually been quite an asshole.

And there’s other factors — he’s out of the country, his apartment is not easy to reach, have no idea where he’s working, and on.

He expects me to just take care of this all.  I also think he really just doesn’t care cause he doesn’t plan on getting married again.  Or just in general, can’t be bothered.

That’s usually his attitude.

So the fear is that if we remain married and then concern of him coming after my millions — this goes big, we’re still married, and he comes after me with the divorce proceedings like that.

That’s my fear.

I need to release that.

Not sure if that’s even what he’s like.  But I wasn’t expecting this b.s. with the divorce either.

Although if I knew then what I know now, I would have seen this could have been a problem with him.

So you live and learn.

But how am I to say now that he wouldn’t do that.  He’d just want to finalize the divorce.

I’m not sure.

In any event, I shouldn’t be focusing on that.  I should be focusing on the paperwork I am submitting today and the judge granting me a hearing on the motion and then granting me a divorce hearing.

I can’t say please enough.  Please let this be granted and approved at the hearing.  Please, please.  I am ready to be free.  I want to fly.  Fearlessly.