June 8, 2013

The other thing I’ve been thinking about lately – or rather, realizing is that it was kind of silly that I got so upset about sharing information with my followers and newsletter people.

Well, not silly cause it was my feelings and it showed me what was wrong.

It was my intuition, my Spirit talking to me about a pattern that needed breaking — and yes, I’m grateful for that and will always be.

But I also smile at it these days — because like I was doing yesterday, an insane amount of research online.

Everything is free.

Free articles — free videos.

Loads of free information.

It makes you wonder why anyone would ever pay for anything?

I think people would if they wanted more personal attention, if they wanted to get off the computer (it was terrible how many hours I spent in front of the computer yesterday!), and a more organized way of getting the material.

But really, this is the world we live in now.  This is the world of the internet.


So really it was silly that I got upset.. just in the fact that there was no way of me making money through those videos.

Unless I wanted to build up to YouTube status…. being a partner, which I don’t even know how you do that nor do I want to spend the time creating a massive following on YouTube (I think that’s something I will do like other stars… it’s something I just saw on Wendy Williams / she does after the show commentary and snippets from her show on YouTube and I’m sure they get paid that way…)

It’s another stream of income.  And that’s awesome.

But I was following that pattern of doing something — over giving and wanting something back, but there was no way to get something back from that direction.  And then I continued going in that direction, even though I was upset and had resentments — when I should have just disconnected and looked for other ways to offer the material and make money.

This was the pattern with my family members.  With my ex.  And with people in my business — as well as you see, it was my relationship with YouTube / inanimate objects.

That’s why I want to step off Facebook too.

That’s another one of those places that I’m not making money… so what’s the point of posting.  I am doing it with the intention of making money — that’s why I’m sharing.  So that’s perfectly okay, but since I have never made money off Facebook postings…. and I don’t want to share when I’m feeling drained, and not in the mood — then I shouldn’t post and I should stop hoping for more from that relationship.

That makes perfect sense.  Hopefully that sinks in and I just stop sharing.

Although lately I started posting solely about myself and the good things that happen in my life, like the number synchronicities and the signs… many times it feels like bragging.. sometimes I feel angry and resentful like why am I showing people what’s possible in their life… and at other times I think it’s a good promotion of my business… and at other times I think it’s fun to celebrate it with others… although at other times I think that it’s private and question why I’m sharing that with others.

Obviously it’s a VERY CONFUSING thing for me still.

I just want to focus on using my talents and gifts to make me money.  Really, it’s what I have to do since that’s been a bit stressful for me lately, since I cashed out of my IRA and saw it was less than expected (I need to call them on Monday) – and I really need to make things happen asap.