May 24, 2013
So I’ve been praying for money again. I know Spirit hears me. I think I’ve been good with my thoughts and feelings.
There’s a gestation period for these things.
I know I’m in the flow. Just need to learn what lessons I have here. To persevere.
I see this with other things going on in my life that are hanging. One of those things is my divorce.
Received another letter from the court. Spirit told me it was sitting in the mailbox and I should get excited. But instead I opened the letter and it was requesting another letter from me. Another action… and I was praying for the court date.
It’s the same thing with my career.
And several other things that are going on.
Wanting things to come to a close. Or wanting things to get rolling, like more paying students and TV job…. but need to persevere.
The daydream lately — the wish is that my mom sends me a check.
I know she’s worrying about me.
And isn’t that funny how that’s the default. Wanting someone to take care of me.
I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
So I’m noticing the thought and thanking it, smiling at it, and counteracting it with “I can do this. I am doing this. I am taking care of myself. I am safe. I am fine. I am good”
Some version of that when it comes up.
And I am safe.
And I am fine.
And I am doing this.
Although, yes I do notice bills coming in. But I also notice I’m much calmer — I am calm, and I go to prayer rather than panic like I did just a week or two ago.
This is good.
And like I said, I know Spirit is there for me. They keep bringing me money on the floor. This morning it was a penny.
Sure I want more than that. I “need” more than that.
But all the things I am learning through this period in my life, I bless it.
I bless this time, I bless my journey.
PS: The other thing I’ve been noticing is that more people are sending me emails that they found my videos inspiring or that they were happy to meet me, etc. I am doing a practice of noticing these people more rather than going into my frustration and upset about the people who just take / watch and don’t do anything to fill my heart space back. Letting these people go, moving forward..