June 8, 2013
So basically what all this comes down to is a shedding of my skin.
Leaving those old stories of “no one likes me” and “I’m a loser” or whatever falsehood behind.
It’s not even true. It never was true and it’s absolutely crazy that that’s how I’ve walked around for such a long time.
It’s totally not true – and never was, so where did I ever get it?
Of course I can go into this family of origin blaming again and the way they made me feel, but I’m not.
It’s old stuff. It’s not true. It’s over. I don’t even talk to them anymore. That last conversation I had with my mom was of me taking back my power. She doesn’t like me in my power… just like my ex never liked me when I was powerful. He always thought I had an attitude and shunned it when I was in my power.
But screw that all. It’s over. And here I am.
So now it’s accepting a new identity for myself. This has been going on for months, but I see myself these days in between the two. Teeter tottering. Questioning… is it okay for me to leave this behind…. I’m a bit scared… a bit nervous.
It’s a knowing that there will be no going back.
Not like it was even a good place to be. But it’s the unknown — but ti’s also everything I’ve ever dreamed of.
My new human suit is ready. It’s time for me to step into it.
I know that.
I also know that Spirit has been helping me get there… as it always helps me.
DEEP BREATHE IN AND OUT.
I can do this. Really good things await me… I know this.