November 7, 2012

I’m releasing my need to control things in my business.  I’ll tell you a story.

There’s a new member in this community.  I know her.  I enjoy her.  She was a past private student of mine.  I speak to her through email.  I know what her thoughts are (not all of them of course) and how she feels (not all of them of course either) 🙂

I know what her intentions are with joining this site… and everything is all good.

But one thing.

She hasn’t started blogging.  Now this is NOTHING about her.  Absolutely nothing – and when you, yes, the one I am talking about reads this post – there is NOTHING wrong you are doing.  You are perfect as is.

This post is about me.  And my insecurities and fears and need to control.  So that’s what I am focusing on here and this is what this post is about.  This is a learning / teaching moment.

Here it goes…

I’ve recently added a forum to this site and I’ve recently decided to make it part of the experience for everyone to blog.  Before I was doing it as optional, but now I am making it mandatory.

Why?  Because I know how hugely beneficial it is to do it.

Also, because I think it makes the environment feel safe and comfortable.  Private.

I blog private stuff.  You blog private stuff.  Sandy blogs private stuff.  Suzie blogs private stuff.  John blogs private stuff.  We all blog private stuff.  It’s public, in this private environment.

That way no one feels like another is spying or judging.  Getting their secrets or in their business more than they are in theirs.

It feels more comfortable this way.

So for comfort and transformation.  That’s why blogging is now required.

But how do I go about enforcing this?

How do I write another email to the new member and say, “Hey, can you please start blogging soon… ” and do I share why I find it important?

And then there are the doubts and the fears….

“I’m being too bossy”

“I’m trying to control”

“I’m being overpowering”

“I’m forcing someone to do something they are not comfortable doing”

And so on…

“She may leave us’

“I want her to stay and play”

“This blog and community is perfect for her”

And so on…

So I am releasing it.  My normal tendency would be to write an email to her.  My other normal tendency would be to do nothing.  I’m stuck.  What am I to do?  I put it out to the Universe of my intentions… and I surrender.

We’ll see what happens.  I may have to write another post about it depending on how I feel and what she does…. 🙂


(which is really so stupid and insignificant)

Release…. surrender.