June 29, 2013
Oh gosh, are you tired of reading my social media posts?
I feel embarrassed — shame — in writing about it.
Some feeling like I should be better than this. That I should be able to make a decision about social media and stick to it.
I do feel it has to do with something more… something about being seen… something about being okay with being thought about, noticed, possibly talked about. Maybe.
Because I was happy being back on. It’s that feeling of connectedness again and being seen.
And yesterday I was tweeting all day long during the trial. It was a lot of fun for me, to express myself.
But then the day was over, it was 6PM and I had spent time doing “nothing” all day.
Then the sadness came in. Disappointment. Shame.
Did I really watch the Zimmerman trial all day and do no work? The pressure of making money and doing something career related. Wow, it was bad.
I told myself I’d go for a swim and it did make me feel much better.
But this regret and embarrassment about tweeting all day. What’s up with that.
Here’s a channeled message I wrote last night before bed – I managed to write it, before I passed out, I was sooo tired.
“Dearest Blaire, enjoy this time of lightness and being. Being. Have fun being. Not everything in life is what we can produce. Sometimes it’s about getting comfortable in our skin – being comfortable in our expression.
You are right – you have outgrown your old life and now you are birthing your new one. Who will you be? What will you like? Now is the time of discovery. And sleep – and your really tired, so relax and let it be.
You did good today. You enjoyed yourself and enjoyed watching and commenting about the trial so don’t feel bad about it. Never feel bad and never regret time spent – when you were enjoying.”
Wow. Isn’t that interesting — and very true.
Also I might add here that I would like to this weekend, not post. I already did this morning, since I was mulling over the case, tossing and turning last night about Zimmerman. Terrible, too sensitive and psychic for this stuff…
So I posted that stuff, but now this weekend, I would like to “disappear” from social media.
Will I be able to do it?
Be a private citizen again?
That’s the thing I desire. To have that silence again.
I really enjoyed time where I was keeping my thoughts to myself. Not dreaming about tweeting. Not wrapped up in that… cause I get wrapped up in thinking about it. And a clearer intuition. That’s what I miss about now, after that day of non-stop tweeting. But yes, it was fun and it’s my way of discussing the case with others..
Okay, I’m off to start my day! 🙂
Excited for the toy store. Excited to go to the library to rent some old time cartoons I used to watch as a kid (another recommendation from the intuitive / teacher. Perfect. Sounds like so much fun. Playfulness, lightness, laughter. Just me — and my energy. Yes.
PS: Tiger was in my dream last night (so was what I thought was a dead dinosaur, which I then realized was a sick/tired/injured giraffe — laying under the ocean). Long story. Here’s the tiger info….
Passion, Power, Devotion
The Tiger is the symbol of darkness
and the new Moon.
When a Tiger totem enters your life,
expect new adventures.
It will awaken new passion and power.
Tiger people do their best work at night.
They are very sensual and passion people and devoted parents.
Your best work will be done at night.
Tigers are associated with water and have all the properties of the element of Water –
healing, power through gentle flow, feminine energies.