May 2, 2013

Last night and this morning I woke up pretty grouchy.  Just not knowing what to do about my manifesting and my attitude towards it.  It’s been feeling like this has been a lot of hard work.  And not like how it usually goes.

The energy has been very up and down this past month, I know that’s what has been adding to the start and stop of dreams happening.  By the time you read this I don’t think the energy will be like it is now — this birth and release — but I know it’s been effecting me cause I’m real sensitive to energy.

Someone shared with me today to have more forgiveness towards myself in this process.

That it’s all happening, the manifestations… which this is what I know, but it’s sooo good to hear it from a human voice and a human voice other than my own.  I just reached a boiling point with it the last day or so.

And they shared to have forgiveness towards myself.  Meaning, to let my down feelings about the manifestations taking longer than I desire or the ups and downs to just let those feelings roll over me.  To be kinder to myself (I’m changing the wording here as I write, as it’s coming through differently now) — to not have such attachment to the outcome that I’m waiting on it as the end all be all.  To be in the present, to celebrate how things have been getting better, to focus on my mind on those things… which I have started doing more (an assignment Spirit gave me) – and to just let it all be.

That anything and everything that is coming up now is helping me get to that gate, where it’s all going to open up and happen… and that Spirit and myself is making sure I am ready.  That everything is lined up.

So patience.  And forgiveness, that if I get frustrated or feel like “why not yet” to just let it flow over me.

Again, it’s about staying in the trust and faith… to keep going forward.

I got myself all worked up the last few days that I was like I WANT THIS NOW DAMNIT!


I’m more mellow about it now.  THANK G-D!