January 31, 2013
So I’m seeing a pattern here.
First there was the literary agent, who I was quick to accept until they disappeared and then reappeared over a month later.
Someone treating me less than how I desire, less than what I deserve.
Since that experience I have come to more of a realization and CONFIDENCE as to the type of literary agent I plan on working with and more of a VALUE for my gifts and what I have to offer. No need to settle, I offer a lot, the agent should as well.
Then there was this pizza guy. A reminder of my past, years in NYC dealing with restaurant and bar and club owners. Same old shit. Guys who treat you like shit, who aren’t on top of things, that neglect your phone calls and emails to them, sometimes replying sometimes not bothering, on and on. You feel like you need them for an event and they’re not really in integrity or welcoming.
Well, within the same week, here comes this lesson and clearing. Pizza guy is a memory of the past. Here is a lesson of the new way I want to do business — the NEW WAY I AM DEVELOPING BUSINESS PARTNERSHIPS.
I’ve already spent too much time and energy sending him the same email 3 times and that’s it. Done. Onto the next.
I’m promoting his business. I’m putting up his website link. I’m sending people on my website and meetup to his italian place, whether to join my group or go at their own time. Plus I am paying him for the food they eat. I didn’t ask him or bargain for a lower price, didn’t ask him or bargain for any special deals. Yes, my old self was pushing for this in my mind, but I am just starting this up and these are new people I am gathering. We all get paid. Win win all around. It’s all good.
But energy is unbalanced and this is not the way I want to proceed. Forget it. On to the next.
And then today there was interactions with my ex. You know he’s been on my mind a lot, our relationship has been on my mind a lot since I have been writing this book about my lessons learned and more. Well, another interaction with him about divorce papers and another lesson in getting no where.
I’m going to save the rest of this about him for my book but it’s just another example of old relationships that take too much of my energy and don’t provide much back. I was getting nowhere there.
And then, again today a request for a newspaper interview. Initially going to do it, then declined with the realization that this is what I want to be writing for Valentines Day and more, rather than sharing this stuff with other writers. Another reworking of how I do business…
So yes this feels like more work, to attract a new agent, to attract a new restaurant, to attract a new man/partnership, and to attract a new writing job, but attraction is quick and clear when you know what you are seeking.
Interestingly enough, at the time I write this last sentence Spirit is showing me 888. Thank you
888 — A phase of your life is about to end, and this is a sign to give you forewarning to prepare. This number sequence may mean you are winding up an emotional career or relationship phase. It also means there is light at the end of the tunnel. In addition it means, The crops are ripe. Don’t wait to pick and enjoy them. In other words, don’t procrastinate in making your move or enjoying the fruits of your labor.
So busy week, wouldn’t you say and it’s only Thursday.
New ways of being in relationships, both business and personal.
I see a pattern here. Interesting and thank you.
PS: After I wrote this I thought of 1 more business thing that happened this week and 1 more personal thing that happened that helped me re-clarify what I was standing for and saying I DESERVE MORE.
Grateful I am in this place. It’s one thing to be picky and have standards – wanting more, but I think it’s a process of learning and discovering to actually stand in that confidence and the knowing to be ABLE TO ACTUALLY SAY I DESERVE MORE.