June 6, 2013

As I was walking Magic tonight I was reminded of three things.

1 –  Walking with my ex around our neighborhood in the evenings with Magic.  How in love and how good it felt to be walking with “my man.”

Weird thought that came to mind… but I’m just sharing…. lots of things about my relationship with him have been coming up at random times.  Little snippets of memories, good memories.  I know love is coming to me.  I have been thinking about being in a relationship more and more these days.  Opening up to it again.

2 – Next thought.  How I am in this trusting mode right now.  Going silent, praying to Spirit — what’s next?  How will you connect me to work out this TV deal?  Do I need a TV agent?  Is that the way? Or contact some of the people who I know, execs at TV companies.  And then a review about that TV exec I spoke to.  If I want to work with him or not.  I am leaning towards a “no.”  I will only work with people who are in alignment with me, and honor their words.  After all, that’s all we have to go on in this world.  So I need to be able to trust your words.

I was walking around thinking on how it’s really interesting and exciting how I am in total calm and trust through this.  Doing my goals, my dreams, my work like and life in general differently.  Focusing my mind, aligning my energy to draw it to me.  Not the physical exertion like I used to.

3 – Then when I came into the house a reminder of this behind the scenes video I saw of Wendy Williams today.  She was talking about making your dreams come true and how sometimes it’s too late — and sometimes how it all falls together at once.  She was talking about her guest for that day (don’t remember the ladies name, I don’t know her) — and she was talking about Betheny Frankel.  She shared how Betheny said she had $100 or something like that in her bank account when her TV show deal worked out – and how in the same year she made loads of money through her business, got the guy, had the baby.  All at once.  I have been thinking for quite a while that this is how it will all happen for me — this and next year.  All come together.  That’s why I have been preparing all these book parts — for my two, actually three books — getting it all ready… then preparing for this TV show.  It’s all going to pop off one after the other.  That’s how it feels.

4 – I was then reminded of how I worked in TV in my early 20s and before.  How it came so easily — I just focused my thoughts. I was reminded of my job at Change of Heart, and I started giving an interview (out loud, pretend) about how that place was no longer a match for me because I wanted to be on camera.  Memories of how I was given an on camera position, but at the time I didn’t know I was an empath and felt terrible (and couldn’t) get in someone’s face to interview them about how their boyfriend just cheated on them.  I felt the girl’s complete sadness.  It had me standing still, felt terrible for her.  I couldn’t go rub it in by interviewing her.

Then I went on to talk about how I am creating a network that we don’t sensationalize on people’s problems.   Basically a heart centered organization with good people who care about one another, not just ratings.  Something like that.  That’s interesting.  The second time (or more) I had a thought, vision that I was creating a whole network.

xxx

Had a daydream outside that I was written up in Variety (I just saw this posted by one of the tv execs I’m in contact with through FB) about how I’m an up and comer.  Not working in TV since 2001 and how out of nowhere I come on the scene, create, pitch and sell my TV show – – then take a lead role in developing it.  It’s really incredible and I see myself in that scenario.  I’m good at what I do and I sure do have a vision.  Reminds me of the creator of GIRLS, Lena Dunham.  She comes to mind a nice amount of time. People admire her career launch — and she signed a 7 figure book deal.  Wow.  That’s an “it” girl.  I feel like my career is going to be propelled just like hers.  Wow, imagine that.  I’m excited for it 🙂 Yes. Thank you, amen.