June 8, 2013

That TV exec.  And I feel hesitancy about it.

Why?

Well, he wasn’t really good at following up.  He did make it sound like we were going to talk on Monday — and that he was going to email me on Thursday or Friday — which he never did.

There’s that old part of me that says… Blaire, cut people some slack, maybe something came up.

But the new part of me says…. Forget it.  You don’t trust him.  He’s not of his word.  Something was off with his communication.

I feel suspicious of him now.

I don’t feel comfortable sharing my idea / my pitch with him.

So I feel nervous about my call with him.  Don’t want to slip out and get into that zone of pitching and pick me, pick me.

But I have self control, I can hold that back.

Again, I am reminded that I can listen to him talk… something that I didn’t do much of the last call.

And I can see what ideas he has.

I can get information from him about how a development company works and his role in it.

And use the chat like that…

Keep it open ended.  Get develop more of a relationship.

Well, it seems like i know what to do… but I still feel a bit nervous about it.

There’s also the other part of me that says… he’s in development, pitch him and get your idea out there.  Start filming your show — and you don’t know who else you are going to pitch or connect with.

But that’s my ego.  That’s my fear.

And my Spirit says, be open, you never know who will contact you through Facebook or other.  I still feel that that woman I emailed that I felt drawn to through Facebook, the one who by the looks of her website I really want to work with, she looks professional, smart, and savvy, plus experience in new types of shows… well, I want to work with her — and although she didn’t email me back from my email last week, I still have the thought that she may email me soon, at least I’m hoping to connect with her and she’s all and more than I am assuming she is 🙂