January 13, 2013
As I’m pretty sure I shared with you, I don’t have many friends. I consider everyone at this point in my life an acquaintance. Sure, I bumped into a “friend” yesterday that I was really good friends with throughout college and afterwards, but really…. at this point, he’s an acquaintance.
Most of my students have only a few friends as well. Some don’t have any friends.
This is all fine with me, but this is something else that I’ve been thinking abut regarding the growth of my business, etc…
These people – experts – or however they classify themselves that I have seen expand their business and grow it in the last several years first off, are not healers. Second, and I know this is another judgmental thought, but I don’t consider them spiritual like they may say they are. Well, actually yes, maybe they are spiritual – but again, I know my work goes much deeper.
You see, when you are doing the work that I do, you end up clearing out A LOT of the past. A lot of friends and that makes your journey being a solo one. Always.
Everyone that I know who goes on this “dark night of the soul” deep work is a solo person. Maybe when they are done with all the healing they start bringing in friends, like I am now…. although again, they are casual friends, not deep, dark secret friendships… but anyway, all these people who I have observed have been “popular”
And when people are popular, who’s their following? Well their friends of course. That’s how it all starts and that’s how they build the momentum to look bigger than they are – and then that expands on one another, bigger and bigger.
So when I don’t have “friends” – or fine, when I don’t have MANY friends (which is more accurate than saying I don’t have any cause I do….) and when my students don’t have many friends…. well, then a situation like that is going to produce results like I have now.
I’m not justifying here, but it makes sense.
For years I didn’t value relationships with other people – just myself.
That was all I could handle. It was my relationship with myself… my relationship with Spirit…and my relationship with my ex.
That was a lot of work and took up all of my time and energy. I was exhausted.
So again, this is not justifying or “poor me” this is just a better understanding for me to really get why things are the way they are now. It brings in more compassion for myself at this time…. I get it.
So, businesses are built on relationships, but if someone is not having a relationship with anyone but themselves and Spirit, well that’s what they’re going to continue to get….
But now, as I have shared, I’m opening up more to the outside world. What I call “mainstream people” – why? Cause I feel like making friends. I feel like being social. I have more patience and understanding with people. I am ready to serve more.
Before Spirit was getting me ready. I was “serving” myself. Spirit was serving me.
Now that I am built up more, I am interested in helping others. Even though over and over again I was saying that this is what I wanted to do in the past, the truth was, I didn’t have the ENERGY to do it cause I was going through so much healing myself.
So here we are. Understanding things better. All in time. I am seeing it clearer now. Thank you.