April 19, 2013

So again today — I made my video, felt on a great high and then the rest of the day I got real tired and sad.  Grant it I was tired from last night’s talk on the beach.  I was going to rest today (I think) but I got inspired to make the video, so I did.

But then today again, a shifting — a sadness.

A walking around or laying around wasting away of the day.

Not really in the mood to do anything.

An overall sadness.

It’s just a clearing out — the end of one cycle, as the doors to a new cycle opens.

I don’t remember having sadness like this before.

I think this has been on and off around weekend time (this has also been during this week as well) for a few weeks now.

A sort of not knowing what to do with myself.

I could go clothing shopping.  But then I don’t feel like driving there.

I could go to the movies, but again, not really in the mood.

I could go to Home Depot to get more art supplies – I have to go, but again there’s no motivation to do it.

So who knows?

Just an overall tired / dull / sad feeling.

Sitting here, staring at the walls.

It’s a clearing out… a clearing out and an ending of a cycle.

When you’ve cleared so much and have nothing to do — waiting for new things to begin.

So I rest.