March 12, 2013
No one from the leadership team — well actually, the leader – has not gotten back to me yet about bringing in this author. They are so slow, stupid policies, holding me up, in organizing this event.
I think they should get back to me today, but I think there may be issues moving forward. If I bring this leader in with helping me organizing this I have a feeling they are going to run past this guy who has issues with me and causes problems — I think they’re going to run it past him and he’ll say no or whatever about it.
This is all bullshit.
This other guy organizes events and doesn’t even check in with this leader. The whole thing has such a double standard, and the common element here is the leader has no balls. That’s the only reason why he keeps checking in with this guy, cause he’s scared. Scared of what he’ll say, scared of what he’ll do.
So a thought came to me this morning. Do it on my own.
I could ask this guy to do a virtual interview and interview him that way — and record it.
Yes, feels totally sleezy and I know other people in my writer’s group want to see him, but it’s the 12th and this event is 3 weeks away. What are they waiting for?
Totally a back stabbing thing, I think.
Well, maybe, kind of.
These guys don’t own me. But does this make me a vulture? Anything out for my agenda?
No. I just really don’t like checking in with someone else and being told what I can and can’t do. And that’s how it’s been in this group since day 1.
Ugh.
I am being patient. Seeing what happens today. But I am also making other plans, daydreaming about options in my head. I’m excited about interviewing this guy and would like to do more of this stuff. I also would like to do it in front of a crowd, since this puts me out of my comfort zone and stretches me. Gives me a new experience – being in front of people, being a leader.