February 28, 2014
I’ve noticed lately how my mom generally gives me bad advice.
Although I guess I should rephrase that — it’s different guidance than what my Spirit tells me.
I noticed it first the other day when I was seeking an eye doctor. As I shared with you guys I recently reconnected with my parents (right before the New Year) and have been seeing my mom more and more lately. Speaking to her more. Our old relationship — and the relationship I used to have with her when i was younger was that she was my best friend.
(That makes me kind of sad, as I’ve been thinking about that lately — since our relationship is different now, plus her being my “best friend” was really not what would be a best friend relationship as I would consider it now. In many ways she has been my “archenemy” of sorts)
In any event, I’ve been speaking to her more. I started asking her advice and guidance again… like I used to.
Well, the other day I asked her for an eye doctor.
She told me to call a certain doctor, to say I had something wrong with my eye to get me seen right away, and so that it’s covered by insurance and that while I was there to just get a full exam. She saw that as my way in.
Now my mom is doing this to be helpful. But when I called the doctor’s office and they placed me in for an appointment, the lady was adamant that I had to schedule a separate appointment for a full exam.
Well that was a waste of a call. And a lie. And it didn’t get me what I wanted — a full exam.
(This may be hard to follow, since I am trying to keep this story short but I am sure you get the gist here) 🙂
In any event, my mom steered me wrong.
Then she was sending me other doctor info.
And more info.
Then she told me — “Do what you want”
And I was then totally confused. Head spinning. Lost. Unsure as to what doctor to go to. (Again, there’s a bit more to this story, since I wear contacts, and need a pair of glasses just in case, etc, etc)
So I just stepped away from the directions she was sending me in.
I figured I’d just deal with it later. It was all too much to think about then and too confusing. So I let it be.
And then on my way to get my massage for that morning Spirit lead me directly to the right place for me. A cheap exam with glasses included. Or actually glasses that were 2 for $69 – super cheap, with a free exam included. Perfect. Just what I needed – an eye exam. The free glasses were a bonus.
So there we go — Spirit led me. I was lead. My way was the best way.
Now this has happened again with something else having to do with my move.
I was going to do one thing — then my mom adds in her two cents, trying to be helpful, but then again potentially confusing the whole situation.
And it made me think of how my life has been. Going in circles.
My mom setting me up for failure.
My mom telling me to go against my own good guidance. My own psychic knowing.
Now she’s just trying to be helpful.
She’s not conscious of what she’s doing. Her “bad” advice. And yes, plenty of times she was there and helpful.
But this was how my life was. I would always turn to HER — rather than go with my own guidance.
Always thinking HER guidance was the better way. When it just got me confused and going in circles.
Now this had to work for me to a certain extent, but again this is the patterning that we all have to a certain extent with different things. This dysfunctional way of being in the world — this being passed down to her from her mother, and her mother, and her mother. Generation to generation.
It’s a way my mom took away my power.
It’s a way I gave it away.
And of course when you’re a kid you don’t know any better.
And on a soul level, I’m grateful because this is what my Spirit asked her to do for me in this lifetime so I could step out of the matrix and be in my own power. To become empowered.
Now I am doing my relationship with her differently. I don’t take her guidance as the gospel and I stay close to my guides — my Spirit – my intuition — my G-d. As that’s the right way for me.
Thank you. So grateful this pattern has been broken and I see it so clearly.
A totally new relationship with her.